[75] His obsession with the castle's cleanliness led him to neglect actual security at times, as he forgot to lock the doors at least one time even in the more dangerous hours, something Slughorn reprimanded him for. [2], During the next years, Harry disliked Filch even more, especially when the caretaker took the side of Dolores Umbridge, during Harry's fifth year. It's me, Harry." Harry said calmly. Harry finds a butt plug that makes the person with it in them horny as hell. Harry Potter is such a beautiful, erotic boy, and Gilderoy will have him wrapped tightly around his finger in the time it takes you to say Boggart. Collections: 1 599 Kudos: 1124 Bookmarks: 263 Hits: 50961 Harry Potter/Blaise Zabini/Theodor Nott/Draco Malfoy. In Happy Birthday, Hermione! Like why he hates students so much. At the end of the year, Filch attended the End-of-Term Feast, reunited with his cat. [52], Yerse I've been telling Dumbledore for years and years he's too soft with you all. Harry Potter and the Sword of Gryffindor by cloneserpents - In this beloved erotic comedy with over 1,000 reviews, Harry leads his friends on a Horcrux hunt after reading a magical book that gives him special powers. Harry Potter Wiki is a FANDOM Movies Community. In 1991, Harry and Ron managed to get on Filch's bad side on their very first day at Hogwarts School, when he and Ronald Weasley got lost and inadvertently tried to enter the out-of-bounds third-floor corridor. After years of abuse by his uncle a seven year old Harry Potter is rescued from the Dursleys by a Dementor who senses his pain, Raised in Azkaban with a strange but caring family and new powers how will Harry react to the revelation he is famous, a wizard and has the power to speak to Dementors. [2], Haven't you been complaining about Peeves for a quarter of a century?Minerva McGonagall, in 1998, indicates how long Filch has been working at Hogwarts, In around 1968,[11] Filch joined the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry,[9] succeeding Apollyon Pringle as Caretaker. He hated it. Despite his magical parentage, Filch was a Squib, meaning he could not perform magic. Slut Harry spends Christmas at the Burrow. Filch was also the only one of the Hogwarts staff to stay at Hogwarts Castle during the summer holidays. What a stupid question. Neville Longbottom has a romp with Luna Lovegood inWhat if I Do It Wrong? Filch was furious and kicked Harry out off his office, trying to convince him that the letter was not his, and ordering him not to tell anyone. InA Perfect Dream World by arobynsung, everyones favorite Quidditch girls Alicia Spinnett, Angelina Johnson, and Katie Bell get together. Ask Question Asked 4 years ago. Harry wanted him to do stuff for money, so Gilderoy naturally did as he was told. This isn't going to be everybody's cup of tea. Despite their truthful claims that they were lost, Filch did not believe them and threatened to lock them in the dungeons. Harry decides to have sex in his last year at Hogwarts with anyone that he wanted. "Min ymmrrn kyll. [64] They did not leave instructions on how to remove the swamp and as such, Umbridge and Filch tried fruitlessly different means of removing it. If you like a good threesome,A Nightly Strollby TigerLily8806 might be more your speed. Confused about what he felt and hearing his mum's final words, Harry's mind starts to unlock things that had been better left forgotten. From since Harry was at an early age, his father disdained him. Neatly forged paperwork lands Ed a job teaching summer school remedial chemistry to children who are older than he is. A Black Comedy by nonjon. On occasion, he fruitlessly scrubbed the message with Mrs Skower's All-Purpose Magical Mess Remover, but to no effect. [9] In keeping with his dislike for students and their inevitable tendency to create messes and disorder (which he, as caretaker, would get stuck cleaning up), Filch idolised "the old ways" of discipline and constantly lamented that he was no longer allowed to use corporal punishment. [14] Then, he believed that Harry was the one who petrified Mrs Norris, Filch's cat, as he was one of the few people who knew he was a Squib. Now for the really weird erotica, the stories that defy classification. Lessons With Hagrid by NothingPretentious. Any necessary warnings will be at the top of each chapter, and a little summary will be there as well if you're reading this for the meagre plot included (There's no discernible reason you would be, it's smut) and don't want to read that particular chapter. This one features a lot of different ladies, so buckle up. With the passing of Educational Decree Number Twenty-Three, which appointed Dolores Umbridge to the post of High Inquisitor of Hogwarts, the Ministry effectively started its interference at the school. Gilderoy Lockhart is 100% used to getting what he wants and this time is no different. Among his many file cabinets documenting the punishments he handed out over the years, Filch had an entire drawer dedicated to the twins. [22], During the 19861987 school year, he confiscated Jacob's notebooks in the Three Broomsticks Inn from Jacob's sibling on Snape's orders to confiscate all items related to the Cursed Vaults. In July, Argus Filch attended Dumbledore's funeral in an ancient black suit and tie reeking of mothballs, paying his respects for the man who, despite their opposing views on student punishment, gave him employment as a Squib. Sexetera, Ad Infinitumby nqdonne is the story for you then. Apparently, Filch lost some of his duties, as punishment seemed to be given out exclusively by the Carrows and Severus Snape. by phantompopcorn, Ron gives Hermione the best kind of birthday present. On 7 October, Filch hung a copy of the Educational Decree Number Twenty-Four on the Entrance Hall. That's what fanfiction is about. This series is a collection of one-shots in which Hermione explores several different lesbian relationships. [51], If Filchs trying to learn magic from a Kwikspell course, I reckon he must be a Squib. [18] Although Filch was a Squib and could not make the map work properly,[18] he did know that it was called the Marauder's Map. During this time, he became more vicious than ever, and wrote students up for things like "breathing loudly" and "looking happy". Find moreerotic stories here. [73], Filch had been looking for someone to clear out his old punishment files, and when Severus Snape put Harry Potter in detention for hurting Draco Malfoy, he put Harry to work by making him copying out the misdeeds and punishments afresh and making sure that they were in alphabetical order without the aid of magic. The dark side of Gilderoy Lockhart's one-sided love for Henrietta. I had no idea Percy Weasley and Oliver Wood were such a popular pairing until I started doing research for this article, at which point I uncovered a whole slew of Percy/Oliver erotica. [53], Prior to the start of the school term, Filch fastened the list of forbidden items to his office door in an attempt to make students read it. PEEVES! Once again, this story features the surprise star of M/M Harry Potter erotica, Percy Weasley. "Well at least we know Potter's an . After he opened a book that screamed, Filch arrived on the scene almost immediately but was unable to see Harry. He was born to at least one wizard parent sometime before 1951,[1] presumably somewhere in the British Isles. [28], Later in the year, Jacob's sibling and Merula Snyde interrogated Filch to see if he was the "mole" for "R" in his office. Arthur is fascinated by Harry's stretch marks. Lily however loved Harry. On luonnollista haluta lis heti kun on saanut ensi maistiaisen - ja min syytn itseni siit, ett annoin sen maistiaisen sinulle"SK s. 203. They were saved by Quirinus Quirrell, who vouched for them while passing by. [43] Filch searched both the dungeons,[42] the Astronomy Tower and the Owlery,[43] but found no sign of him. When Filch's cat, Mrs Norris, was petrified, Dumbledore seemed to care about Filch and his cat. And also all four of them together. [83], Immediately after the battle, Filch grimly looked at a large pile of rubble in the Entrance Hall, which he dutifully began trying to sweep up, while the fighters gathered in the Great Hall mourning over the dead, and celebrating over their victory.[82]. He also asked the Headmaster to let him use the shackles on Jacob's sibling as they were, in his eyes, very rebellious for facing the Cursed Vaults[84], Sniff around, my sweet, they might be lurking in a corner.Filch talking to Mrs Norris, Possibly the only being in Hogwarts that Filch actually liked was his beloved cat, Mrs Norris. He felt perfectly content. Filch was then joined by Severus Snape when the two got hold of Harry's egg and the Marauder's Map. [14], He was also very domineering, controlling and paranoid, as demonstrated by the numerous times he asked students what they were doing when they were simply wandering around in what he thought was a suspicious manner.[42]. [13], During the Start-of-Term Feast in the evening of 1 September, Filch stood by the double doors leading to the Great Hall as Headmaster Albus Dumbledore gave his start-of-term notices. [24], During this school year, he also caught Jacob's sibling with Nicholas de Mimsy-Porpington in the Potions Classroom. You've been stealing! [62] However, the counterattack against Umbridge was now in full force: much of the student body opposed Umbridge and Filch. [A non-magical AU. Did you lovethe movieGroundhog Day but also lamented the lack of wizard boy sex in it? Dumbledore then knocked down the Ministry officials, and left the school undetected. After a rough summer with his family, Harry is just happy to see his friends again. Then, Professor Alastor Moody (actually Barty Crouch Jnr under the Polyjuice Potion) appeared and made them leave, convincing them that no one was there, saving Harry and later giving Harry's things back. If youre like me, you might enjoyRuns in the Familyby TransBoyWonder. Check outThings I Learned in Schoolby janed. While we've done our best to make the core functionality of this site accessible without javascript, it will work better with it enabled. Sometimes a mans love for fruit knows no bounds. [59] Later that same month, after Gryffindor's abysmal performance in their Quidditch match against Hufflepuff, the Slytherin sang Weasley is Our King so loudly and frequently that Filch banned the song from the corridors out of sheer irritation.[60]. [9], Later on, Filch and Madam Pomfrey oversaw the evacuation procedure of underage students and of those not willing to fight, via the Room of Requirement. Harry the Hufflepuff by BajaB. The strange gifts he has, and isn't going to question, should help in that regard. My sweet! [82] He presumably kept doing what he was used to: punishing the students and arguing with Peeves the Poltergeist, even under the new Headmistress Minerva McGonagall. (Set during second year and wil progress from there without Voldemort rising)Warning: Read at your own risk. A prompt from Kamerreon's Prompt Generator. [13] He disliked the students and constantly hassled them over the littlest infraction and took delight in the doling out of detention-worthy write-ups. We Go Way Back: 25 of the Best Historical Fiction Books of the Past 10 Years, The Bestselling Books of the Week, According to All the Lists, New Releases Tuesday: The Best Books Out This Week, 11 of the Best Shnen Manga to Read in 2023. A darker Harry Potter and Ginny Weasley get together shortly after Voldemort's return. In 1992, after Mrs Norris was petrified by Salazar Slytherin's Basilisk, Filch was furious; however, his cat was healed by the end of the year. [62] Also, as Umbridge granted Filch permission to torture misbehaving students,[64] whereas Dumbledore would never even think of such things, he had loyalty to her. One of the most popular male on male couples in the Harry Potter fandom are Sirius Black/Remus Lupin (WolfStar). [2] She had dust-coloured fur and yellow, lamp-like eyes. He knew how it felt to be ignored, so he gave special care to pay attention to his studentsnot only in regards to their studies, but to their mental health, too.Remus Lupin was the first person to notice what Harry was hiding, and he was the first adult to care enough to do something about it. Harry Potter was the son and only child of Prince James and Princess Lily. Arthur and Molly's children have all grown up and moved out. [57] Filch also assisted Umbridge when she had Trelawney sacked, something he most likely took pleasure in, as it caused Trelawney great stress and reduced her to tears. Velhomaailmassa on monia erikoisia perinteit, jotkut niist ovat Harrylle iloisia ylltyksi. How will being left in the hands of a sexual predator at a young age affect the upcoming war? The Dragons Brideby Rizzle, Hermione and Draco find themselves naked, tattooed, and married after a drunken night of debauchery. Book 6, Brotherhood. by snarkysweetness. Once there, Slughorn said that he had not issued him an invitation. Sometime in 1989 or 1990, Fred and George let off a Dungbomb and were caught by Filch, who took them to his office and threatened them with his usual unpleasant punishments he always had in mind. Filch even threatened Harry after finding him standing by the petrified Mrs Norris, Dumbledore had to calm him down. Nobody would have thought of throwing Fanged Frisbees down the corridors if I could've strung you up by the ankles in my office, would they? What if Lockhart had prevented Harry from following the voice in the pipes? Mrs Norris, like her master, was infamously bad-tempered with anyone but Filch himself. As much as I prefer my canon couples, non-canon erotica is where the Harry Potter fandom really starts having fun. So, it used to be true crack, but somehow I made the end emotional. [67] Filch brought her her luggage, as she was stopped by a mob of Daily Prophet reporters who took pictures of her escape. [42], Later in the evening of that same day, Sirius Black broke into the Castle and tried to enter Gryffindor Tower; this resulted in the destruction of the Fat Lady's portrait. Wake up the whole castle, will you? Choose an interesting character, preferably a more obscure one that not many other people will have written about, and put them into a new situation. [26], Filch's relationship with most professors was unknown. A Question of Valueby Inell pairs Hermione with Percy Weasley on the Quidditch Pitch. He also told Professor Dumbledore, in what he said was the four-hundred-and-sixty second time, to remind the students that magic was not permitted in corridors between classes.[53]. One of the most popular male on male couples in the Harry Potter fandom are Sirius Black/Remus Lupin (WolfStar). After the battle, he returned to his position of caretaker, as he was immediately seen sweeping near the Great Hall. [74] Slughorn seemed to have, however, put their differences aside when he tended to Filch's injuries during the Battle of Hogwarts. Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Adventure - Chapters: 41 - Words: 178,099 . The twins noticed a filing cabinet marked Confiscated and Highly Dangerous so, curious, they let off another Dungbomb in his office and "nicked" the Marauder's Map, which was stored inside that drawer, from him. M/M erotica continues to dominate Harry Potter fanfic, but there are still quite a few notable lesbian stories out there. Malfoy, however, never showed up and instead tipped Filch that there would be students out of bed in the Trophy Room. She jumped and hugged Harry, almost knocking him to the ground. 1. During his tenure as Headmaster, Snape kept Filch working at Hogwarts despite his status as a Squib. Hagrid vouched for them, but Filch rudely undermined Hagrid's authority as a teacher, with Hagrid insulting Filch for being a Squib in retaliation. Umbridge's Educational Decrees were abolished, as well as her Approval for Whipping, as Albus Dumbledore was reinstated as Headmaster, meaning that he never got the opportunity to inflict corporal punishment on the students. Sign up for Kissing Books to receive news, book recommendations, and more for residents of Romancelandia. Filch attended the Start-of-Term Feast in the evening of 1 September, 1995 in which he stood by the double doors leading to the Entrance Hall, and listened attentively to Dolores Umbridge's speech. The films omit Peeves the Poltergeist, and so Filch's ongoing war with him is omitted also. What are they doing here? Harry's 6th year is off to a rough start. [82] During the one hour-long interruption in the battle, Filch was at the Great Hall, where his injuries were treated by Horace Slughorn. In a world where Vernon decided to get the freak out of his house as long as possible before he starts training his magical powers, the man sells Harry to his boss for the next five years when Harry was five. [4], Harry Potter: Hogwarts MysteryArgus' sceptical personality against Jacob's sibling party invitation, In the 19841985 school year, Filch and Mrs Norris found the cursed ice. [6] Skinny-ankled,[72] Filch would usually wheeze[13] and shuffle when walking. He was later approached by Jacob's sibling who was concerned about Pince's plan for the Ball and told him Pince loved gorgeous settings such as such as flowers, music and refreshments instead. Still Waters Run Deep by sarhea keeps with the Hermione/Percy pairing and reminds us that prim and proper doesnt mean passionless.. But when Educational Decree Number Twenty-Nine comes in, Potter, I'll be allowed to do them things and she's asked the Minister to sign an order for the expulsion of Peeves oh, things are going to be very different around here with her in charge.Filch takes Harry Potter to Headmistress Dolores Umbridge, After Lord Voldemort's return, and as part of its campaign to discredit Albus Dumbledore and Harry Potter, the Ministry of Magic instated Dolores Umbridge as Defence Against the Dark Arts professor. Filch first demanded they confess to having set off a Dungbomb in the Gryffindor common room, given their habit of trouble (which was in fact the work of Fred and George Weasley). [65], Inspired by the twins' legendary flight to freedom, a great number of students wreaked havoc in the school: Lee Jordan[66] put Nifflers into Umbridge's office, which promptly tore the place apart while searching for shiny objects and leapt on Umbridge when she entered, trying to gnaw the rings off her fingers. Harry Potter and the Last Horcrux by Mike. Hiding, are you? Harry has won the Triwizard Tournament, Cedric is dead, and Voldemort is back. Spend a few pages writing out your plot. [2] It can be assumed that Filch was grateful after Mrs Norris was cured. He brought the Professor to the corridor where he found the ice. Filch disliked Rubeus Hagrid, the Gamekeeper and later Care of Magical Creatures professor. Ronald Weasley demanded to know what did it matter if the students were smuggling Dark objects out of the premises, and his cheek earned him a few jabs with the Sensor. As Snape discussed with Filch, he wanted to take those objects in order to find who they belonged to (suspecting that they were Harry's). Mr Filch, the caretaker, has asked me to tell you that the list of objects forbidden inside the castle has this year been extended to include Screaming Yo-yos, Fanged Frisbees, and Ever-Bashing Boomerangs. [71], In October, Filch stood as usual in the Entrance Hall checking the names of students who had permission to go in a Hogsmeade weekend trip. Draco Malfoy, well aware of Filch's overly trust of Rosmerta, took advantage of it by sneaking in a cursed necklace and poisoned mead in an attempt to assassinate Professor Dumbledore.[75]. He's thrilled to be going to the only place he considered home. With Luna Lovegood inWhat if I Do it Wrong should help in that regard stories that defy.... 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